Merlin's Academy for Excellence
IMPORTANT NOTICE: Due to inactivity, Merlin's Academy is no longer a Harry Potter RP site. It is being used for CASUAL, CLEAN RP of ANY TOPIC among friends. If you wish to join, however, please feel free; we would love to make new friends. Thanks to everyone who made MAE what it was before, and we wish you all lots of love and a great life up ahead. <3

~Lor, Mads, Lyd, and Mel~

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~Month: September~

Year: 2017

~Season: Autumn~

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     A Lesson Learnt (Open-ish)

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    Mackenzie O'Brien

    Posts : 92
    Location : Texas

    A Lesson Learnt (Open-ish) Empty
    PostSubject: A Lesson Learnt (Open-ish)   A Lesson Learnt (Open-ish) EmptyWed Nov 18, 2015 10:01 pm

    Typically, Mac went home during the summers however this year was different. This year Mac had stayed at Merlin's not because she missed her parents but because she was sort of avoiding them. Earlier that year, Mac's parents had given birth to another little girl, Lillian and while Mac was thrilled, she sort of felt left out. She wasn't jealous, or at least she didn't think she was but that fact that her parents had suddenly created a new little human eighteen years later hurt. They had written their reason in a letter when they told her about the pregnancy and it had been something along the lines of them missing two little feet made of their DNA running around. Mac knew that they weren't doing it to hurt her but that's what it felt like. Also, the past year something had happened at Hogwarts, however Mackenzie hadn't been allowed to know the details. All she knew was that it had been bad enough for her parents to move away to an uncharted location meaning even if she wanted to visit, she couldn't.

    The breakup between Mac and Parker had taken it's toll on her. So much, that it even caused her relationship between her and Braelynn to become strained. Mac, for the most part, was busy holed up in her room - their room? - only to be seen for meal times and class times. It wasn't even that it was Parker's fault, in fact it was both of their faults for it had been a mutual decision. Neither seemingly had the trust or emotional stability to be in a relationship at that point and it caused several fights. Mac felt horrible about it, especially since they'd never had the time to make things right before Parker had left for some trip or something. Parker leaving after their horrible breakup made her realise what a horrible friend she'd been recently to Brae and Nova and everyone else she'd ever spoken to. It made her realise that she should never fight with anyone or get frustrated because what if something would have happened to Parker while away? Their fight would have been the last words they'd ever exchanged.

    Her fingers touched the wood of her guitar, brushing off some dust and cobwebs. When she first arrived at Merlin's - she was incredibly homesick. She spent her days sitting on a slab of rock by Sapphire Lake, doing absolutely nothing but thinking about how sad she was to be away from her parents. That was - at least until she met Braelynn. Braelynn had helped her learn to play guitar, or at least she'd taught her the basic chords, the foundations of playing. If it weren't for Braelynn, the wooden instrument would have never been gifted to Mac, it would be sitting in the room of someone who played it often, someone who cherished it and wore it down from the amount of love they gave it. However after Parker and her had split, Mac lost interest in all things musical - guitar playing and piano playing. She had also quit drawing and for a while, she wouldn't even attend classes because to her, there was no point. She would be forever alone, she'd never have her first kiss and she'd never have a family. Mac sighed and closed her fingers around the neck of the guitar.

    The strap hung loosely around her body allowing the wooden instrument to rest along her back as her feet carried her down a well known path. The blue lake came into view as did the gray slate of granite rock. Mac sat down on the ever so familiar rock, her legs crossed with the golden brown instrument propped on her knee. The sight of her reminded her of the day she met Brae, the day before Parker ever existed to her and she smiled. She missed those days, not because she hated Parker and he didn't exist to her yet but because she missed Brae. She missed her best friend. Mac would give everything to have Braelynn back as her best friend. The girl tuned the guitar and then strummed it, playing and singing a song Braelynn had so often played and sung. Mac had picked it up easy, possibly easier than she had picked up playing the piano. "This is my heartbeat song and I'm gonna play it been so long I forgot how to -" The string popped and slapped her across the hand, cutting in and causing her to cry out. One thing she didn't know how to do was fix the strings so she'd have to get Braelynn to show her how. She looked down to her hand to see blood now coming out of the stinging cut.

    She set down the guitar and leaned over, putting her hand into the lake to clean it off a bit. The water was cold, like ice and it was only August which was sort of shocking. Pulling it back out, she noticed that it was still bleeding though not as bad and she made a mental note to stop by the Healer later before the Lake water caused an infection to grow. A slight glance to her left and Mac thought she saw someone but that was near impossible. She was quite sure that she had been the only person to have stayed in the dorms this summer meaning there was no other students on campus, or were there? She looked back down to her now broken guitar and frowned. It had been the last gift from her parents that she'd received. She'd asked for it for her birthday/Christmas gift and when they presented it to her, she was quite shocked. She had quickly fallen in love with it and she was so excited to show it to Braelynn only to have the whole breakup incident which resulted in the guitar never getting used properly. However now, she vowed to use it only if it got fixed.

    Last edited by Mackenzie O'Brien on Fri Dec 04, 2015 9:55 am; edited 1 time in total
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    Nova Foreman
    Nova Foreman
    Dragon Trainers In-Training
    Dragon Trainers In-Training

    Posts : 75

    A Lesson Learnt (Open-ish) Empty
    PostSubject: Re: A Lesson Learnt (Open-ish)   A Lesson Learnt (Open-ish) EmptyFri Dec 04, 2015 9:41 am

    ((***Possible trigger warning for mild depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts*** Y'know, just in case.))

    Having spent almost the full extent of her summer indoors, save for the trip between the dorms and the music room, Nova directed her gaze out of her window, almost wondering if there would be any point in going outside—it had been roughly two days since her last excursion, but thus far she had had no motivation to leave her room.  She wanted to forget about everything but on every cold morning, before the sun had the chance to warm the earth, she lied in bed and could only think of what had been—her mother waking up on Mother's Day to a makeshift breakfast; her father teaching her to play piano while her mother watched from the doorway, encouraging every small step Nova accomplished; the both of them offering tearful goodbyes as she left for school, promising that she'd make great friends and that they would see her come winter and summer.  Her first year of school had been a train wreck of barely getting to know people, isolation, and more anxiety and pain than she had signed up for.

    Everything you love will die

    Though Nova had attempted to ignore the subject that had caused her numbness and apathy, there seemed to be no avoiding it this time; she was stuck thinking but not feeling, and any words or sobs she could ever have always caught in her throat, clawing at it and wrecking her heart in the process.  Nothing mattered.  She had nightmares in the nights she managed to sleep, taunting her and drawing dark pockets under her eyes to claim her as their own.  She didn't care anymore.  Nothing mattered not even the fist reaching its fingers down her neck to crush her stomach and destroy what health she had.  Something was wrong with her and she knew it.

    You aren't worth anything
    Stop lying to yourself
    Just stay here with me

    Yet still, she did nothing.  She remained inside and hid from the sun that illuminated the truth, from the stars that only screamed of her loss.  Nova had abandoned what little life she had possessed in favor of nothingness, because perhaps that would numb the pain.  What would she do once she was no longer able to isolate herself?  What about after graduating—what about classes—what about—

    Most of the time, worries overtook everything—almost a relief—but on that day, when she caught a glimpse of someone at the lake, Nova felt the tiniest urge to leave her room and just run.  Control would not allow her to completely discard her exhaustion and anxiety, instead compromising with letting her go outside but feel a terrible sickness in the pit of her stomach; she was almost persuaded not to go at all once that hit her, but still she managed to persist despite her weak will, and turned to face the door of her room.  Of course the hardest part is leaving, she mused darkly, staring blankly at the doorknob and wondering if she should even bother putting shoes on; the weather wasn't nearly cold enough, even if it was summer.

    Eventually Nova found herself outside, barefoot in a loose, wrinkled shirt and old shorts, wondering if the person at the lake would think twice about her own state; hopefully not.  Making sure not to step on any volatile objects—oh, but wouldn't you deserve it?—she slowly made her way down to the lake, discretely watching her surroundings to ensure there were no other students hidden out of sight, until finally she was able to see straight to the bottom of the murky liquid.  Shoving her hands into the pockets of her shorts, she stared down at the water and everything it held, then shifted her gaze to the right.  A person, a girl, Mackenzie.   The now constant apathetic expression made no indication of changing, even as she recalled the girl's name and how she knew it.

    How heartless of you
    There's no way she'd remember you

    A foot descended halfway into the frigid water, the result of a strange impulse that Nova had never expected nor planned—you're so close, just go—and she paused for a moment to consider the situation: with Mackenzie so close, it would most likely be difficult to simply leave, yet it would be equally as troublesome to stay when she had nothing to speak about, nor the will to hold a conversation.  She took her foot out of the lake.

    What are you even doing here?
    Just leave, she'll want you to
    Who would even notice if you disappeared?
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    A Lesson Learnt (Open-ish)

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